Nothing ceases to amaze!

Happy New Year.

Well it’s been a bumping few months, we have had other issues come back from seeing a ED Psy to now seeing OT and maybe a few more diagnoses will be coming our way.

We now know Oliver has problems with his short term memory, and school have updated staff and put things in place, Oliver now carries a card around with instructions on to show his teachers to remind them of his issues.  Lets see what time shall bring and if it works.

The Aqua paper is helping no end and now I believe instead of paper being stuck in to white page books Oliver has now been giving aqua coloured paper exercise books.  I believe this is only core subject at the moment but it is a step in the right direction.

As for OT what a great first appointment, we walked in and right way she wanted to assess Oliver for a sensory issue, just from his posture lol, (always been awful) I filled in a questionnaire while she did some assessments so we await the results of that. She did have a name for it but for the life of me I can’t remember it.   So the new condition could be something to do with sensory of joints?    I have to do sensory brushing on Oliver and at the moment he really doesn’t like the feel on it.   OT also did a perception test on Oliver, which has come back he has perception issues and now at home we have to encourage him to do word-searches, jigsaws and where’s wally books, to help improve his perception.

I have found out Oliver has a good pencil grip but he has weak hand muscles and we have had to get strong putty for him to play around with and help improve those, I have to say he loves the putty and uses it like a fidget toy. I wonder if he would be allowed to take it into school ?  Also Oliver’s bad handwriting could stem from the sensory side of things, who would ever have known that?

We have another appointment this month to one see how things are going with regards to the things we have been given now, and maybe for OT to do more assessments if she feels the need to or to get the report back and how we go forward in supporting Oliver.

So the OT’s aim is to do as many assessments as needed to get to the bottom of things so then when the time comes for exams etc we can apply for what ever Oliver needs and in the meantime we can get him the correct support.

As heartbreaking as it is, we are on the right road hopefully to getting the correct support for his needs, as support apparently isn’t needed to Asperger’s Syndrome and ADHD and Motor Dyspraxia !

Lets watch this space shall we, good luck in all your journeys.

 

 

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Results, meeting and action.

OK, so I have been taking my time in writing this and thinking how best to put it or to get my head around things.

We received Oliver’s Educational psychologist report, while some things were expected some shocked to the core in a good way and bad way, some things went unanswered.

So Oliver had a reading, spelling and Mental Maths test done to start with,  we know he is below age on his spellings and school do units of sound to help him, so he is about 3 to 3.5 years behind.  Reading he is about 2 to 2.5 years behind but we don’t know how many years behind he is on his reading comprehension, however school have done a test for this and we are awaiting the results.  The Ed Psych did say his reading comprehension would be lower than a child of Oliver’s age due to his  ASD.  We know Maths is Oliver’s strong point more so his Mental Maths well the results came back as age 18+ yep you did read correctly 🙂  amazing and something to be so proud off and it has given him a little confidence boast.

However the working memory test was done in 2 parts and one part Oliver was average and the other he was well below average at the age of a 5 year, no wonder he struggles and can’t write anything from the board down in his book or homework planner, as once he has read it he has forgotten it.

The comments from his tutor hurt as he has always said everything is fine and even teachers at parents evening, but in the report not all is fine!  Oliver is very dependent on his teachers and his focus isn’t always good, if work isn’t good enough and teachers tell him he gets moody with them.  All this tho should be reported back to the SENCO which it isn’t so no wonder they are telling me there is no problems and making me look a negative parent when no one is talking to anyone. To top it all due to Oliver’s needs he is on the SEN register at school so they should know all this.

I was happy with the report but some concerns I had still haven’t been address such as English issues like SPAG and reading.  But we shall see how things go with that.

Recommendations have been put in the report and I really hope they are taken on board and put into action.

1. is teachers need to not comment on Oliver’s writing but to help him set it out in a neater way and accept his handwriting ways.

2. Smaller and clearer instructions have to be given to Oliver to help him work a little bit more independently and not be overwhelmed or not understand the task at hand.

3. More positive feedback has been to given to him but also why he is getting the good feedback, such as that is a good piece of work you have explain this very well.

4. He needs help with writing down the homework in his journal as he will miss information.

Along with more …

Since having the report and going through it I did email school to request a meeting which has now taken place.  The school were sorry for not picking up sooner Oliver’s memory issues which was good, at least now we know and we can move forward.  I did explain how I felt about the tutor comments and lack of communication with staff, and the not being honest with me.  I am hoping this is something they will address but time will tell.

Oliver in his primary school had aqua paper and reading ruler to help him which is something that was said in the report and now his school have given him both to use to see if it helps him this was given to him in the meeting and without me saying or asking for it, they acted on the report.

Oliver has been given a lamented list with some of the key recommendations for him to show his teacher every lesson to remind them of his needs and help Oliver to take and active approach to his learning.  Even tho the report has gone onto the system and key points has been put on to his notes and emailed out to teachers this list has been given to him to give them a reminder as teachers can forget with the volume of child they teach.

School are still awaiting the results of the reading test so as of yet we don’t know where we stand with this but once we have the results then it will give us a level and recommendations of books Oliver could be reading, which might help.

School are looking at a new structure to help with SPAG so once they know if they are going to use it, information will be coming home to help Oliver which is great.  It’s a once again watch this space…

Meetings will happen once a term now, to discuss concerns and to see the improvements and if anything needs to be changed, which is great going forward again.

I just hope teachers put into place the recommendations to help Oliver.

More so Oliver is still amazing and I am so proud of him, this report I just want to help him 🙂

 

Other Children

How do you explain to your child about other people’s behavior and then that person blaming it on their disability IE ADHD or ASD, when you never let your child use the conditions as an excuse for bad behavior.

Oliver was at an after school club when a boy push Oliver towards the ground and pushed his neck (I believe, that’s the story we have, even though it wasn’t fully witnessed)  The adult in charge saw the end of what was happening and spoke to the child involved and told him if he he did anything like that again he wouldn’t be allowed back.  The child turned around and said he was angry and the adult told him that wasn’t an excuse he had to learn to control anger (in a nice caring way to help the child and not make them feel worst I am sure)  then the child said I have ADHD and can’t help it.  To which the adult replied that Oliver has ADHD but he doesn’t behave like that and the child calmed down and went off for a while then came back feeling unwell.

Where is the line we drawn in letting their disability become and excuse?  I know most children have anger issues with ADHD and ASD, I know Oliver does and when we can see him getting angry or he knows he is then we walks away to his room to calm down and when out and about or at school he bottles it up until he comes home and then he deals with it.  He has never hit anyone from anger let alone another child,  So why should another child?  Oliver now doesn’t understand why he was hurt because of someone with ADHD when he has the same and has never done it.  Who is to blame the child (who has can’t control it or has never been taught how to control it) Or the parent ?  In my own personal view and some may hate me for this but I blame the parents for not helping to teach their child, and maybe I am wrong but for allowing the child to use their condition as an excuse for this behavior like this is wrong. Where will the lashing out end someone being seriously hurt.

Why isn’t there more support and understanding out there for one the children involved and even adults with these conditions and more support for parents to help our children to understand a confusing world and a confusing condition.

When will the cycle end?

Cookery

Well today Oliver had cookery, he has had two previous lessons in the kitchen, learning the rules and basics.  But today he cooked!

Every secondary school we looked around with our daughter Oliver hated the kitchens the smell would send him into melt down. So as you can image this was one I would worry about maybe more than I should have.  Oliver cooked bread rolls today, cleaned up (all the drying up and cleaning the kitchen table down must be helping him and his sister).

He came out so proud of what he had done, and when I asked him if the smells had bothered him he said “no”  So it must be different for him when he is involved nothing bothers him but looking around it did.  All the dough was made for them they just had to roll them into balls put them in the oven under adult supervision I am told, take them out and clear up, so washing up, drying up and cleaning down the benches.

One happy mummy and tasty yummy rolls, he can’t wait for next lesson.

Awards

Well it’s the first week back after Christmas and things seem to be going well still. Oliver is having a good week the homework picked up a little in the middle of the week and he coped well, he completed all this homework in the one evening.  His response was if I do it all tonight then 1. I can go to football training and 2. if I don’t get homework tomorrow then I will only have reading to do and can have a night off. That’s what happened 🙂

Oliver came out of school yesterday as normal no reaction from him on anything and then he goes into his book bag and pulls out a small certificate with a big smile on his face.  He was awarded Star of the Week for working hard and always doing the right thing.

As you can image for children with ASD and ADHD doing the right thing isn’t always possible and concentration can stop them from working as hard as they might.  So a massive proud mummy moment for not only Oliver getting the award but for the reasons too 🙂

New School

Well since September Oliver has been in a new school after our move at the beginning of the year and so far things have gone well.

Before he started school allowed a few visits a different times for Oliver to see what goes on in the school day, the sound of the bell, the lunch hall, break time and more he met his teacher and spent time in the classroom before starting as well. All these things helped him look forward to starting a new school.  Once he started the help hasn’t stopped and he has weekly groups for different things and with others in his class as well.

We are two terms in and  Oliver loves school something we have never had, he has been moved to top set in maths and they can see how bright he is and what he excels in and what he needs help in.  He has and extra reading diary and reading book as that is one of his weakness and one of his hates.

With out being rude he is in a school with children that have other learning difficulties and he doesn’t stand out any more he has a another child in his class with ASD and Oliver’s reply to me was he is he doesn’t feel stupid or different because he knows someone else who has the same as he does. I thought that was lovely as one thing we tried to do is not make Oliver feel different or not allow him to try the new things he wants to.

As parents we are pleased with the schools support and I do hope it carries on, but for most of all we are happy that Oliver is happy. Now he is happy we have less meltdowns after school he is now able to keep up with all school work, there isn’t the pressure there any more he can do things in his time, not be rushed and have a high level to achieve then he did before. Lets hope this carries on. 🙂

Happy New Year

After a busy and strange couple of months I need to get back into the habit of blogging and letting off some steam from bad or good days.

Happy New Year